As I understand it, a lot of boys who grew up in the 80’s and saw Labyrinth (who didn’t?) forever have a crush on Jennifer Connelly. But I think even our 80’s boys would notice the bejeweled swap-monster ‘dress’ that Connelly wore to the premiere of He’s Just Not That Into You (do NOT call it a ‘rom-com’, dear Lord). Um…we’re just not that into her dress. Or rather, we hate the dress so much we’d like to burn it and throw it under a train and then let it be used as a tarp to paint a doghouse.

Apparently, some of us can’t let go of the horrible phenomenon that was shoulder pads. And by some of us, I just mean Jennifer. She’s got great legs and the focus is drawn there, when you aren’t starring at the abhorrent sparklyness everywhere else…

On second look, are those shoulder pads…or are her shoulders that bulky and square? The above is actually one of the more flattering pictures of her. Sad.

Additional notes:

Drew Barrymore: You are not pulling off your Audrey Hepburn deconstructed look.

Jennifer Aniston: You look leathery and like you’re trying too hard. Probably because you are.

Ginnifer Goodwin: You actually rocked your look. Pose, pose!

Scar Jo: Um, your hair makes you look mousey. Way to go. The dress is fine, however.

Jennifer Aniston, Drew Barrymore, and Ginnifer Goodwin are starring in the new movie, He’s Just Not That Into You, that comes out tomorrow. They are Marie Claire magazine’s March 2009 cover girls. How cute do they look on the cover? In the interview in the magazine they talk about hookups, breakups, and the importance of girlfriends. Here are the highlights:

On the lamest break up line:
Drew Barrymore: Definitely the classic: “It’s not you, it’s me.”
Ginnifer Goodwin: Oh my gosh, I’ve dished that out, and I’ve taken it.
Jennifer Aniston: You cover all your bases with that one.
Drew: I hate getting “It’s not you, it’s me,” because I’m never gonna learn and grow from that. I don’t want to live on lies and smoke and mirrors and horseshit. No way.

On the first thing they do after a break up:
Drew: Head straight for the carbs. Macaroni and cheese. Kraft. Deluxe. The kind with the cheese you squeeze out of a bag that takes at least a month to pass through your body.
Jennifer: I don’t eat a lot. I go straight to my girlfriends, though.
Ginnifer: The first thing I do is call my little sister. She drops everything.
Drew: She parachutes in?
Ginnifer: Yes! I’ll call and say, “I’m breaking up right now, come get me.” She absolutely has picked me up from hookups, with coffee in hand. [At press time, Goodwin had just broken up with actor Chris Klein.]

On how they would choose to meet men if they weren’t celebrities:
Drew: Drunk in a bar. No, wait — kidding!
Jennifer: I’d have to be dragged out to places. Well, like I am now.
Marie Claire: No match.com? No Facebook?
Jennifer: No, no, no. The Internet freaks me out.
Ginnifer: I think it’s the devil. We’re pack animals! We’re supposed to be connecting face-to-face.
Jennifer: The Internet warps reality. If you’re an Internet person, real life will fall short of what you have been privy to online — sexually, emotionally. It’s so unreal and gives you this sense of order where there isn’t any. You can’t drag and paste life!

You can catch the rest of the interview in the magazine on news stands now.

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